illusions of delusions

solutions don’t solve themselves
take a good look
she’s in for the ride of her life
the drunken idiots
the gong shows

trapped under a thin layer of ice like a fly in amber
she was numb struck, cold and there
crisp as the twilight air
much as mist with sunrise 

ice burnt wind howls through the crowd
calling her name
afraid to be seen as a devil
she stood stalk still

her perspicuity leaves her
oozing out of her pores
her body feeling weightless as it flows over heads
through arms
and legs 

losing her sanity
gliding through the air
parting sheets of desperation
her boots find laminate
finally landing 

she steps into a gallery of paper hearts
strung together one at a time
after being savagely sliced apart
only to be coloured on with dull red paint
dripping everywhere 

sauvignon in glass flutes slide down their throats to warm them
to relax their inhibitions and paranoia
she gives herself leeway and lets her boots hit the floor
gyrating with her skirt ruffling
explosive style is the sweet side
she’s always been a creative one
from across the room thoughts are communicated through seductive gazes
winks
inebriated, she finds it difficult to decode the foreign language
confused and lost in the opportunity presenting itself
lonely-ness got her caught 

sly persuasive gestures following piercing stares
cat calling and whistling brought to a new jarring level
a lower level
there are limited options left 

squashing past innocent by standers plopped in her way
not budging like a pissed off herd of cattle in a field
long droopy eyes
slobbery drooling mouths
stepping on hoofs, she waltzes past 

eyes meet
nervous fingers touch
she bites her inner lip to abstain from biting his
fickle tummy butterflies spread their wings
fluttering against her inner walls 

hanging her head
swallowing her pride
the stigma unable to sting more
a haunting virus sweeping one curve to the next
carving out cavities in her lungs
words are hitting the floor
with the impact of a bullet 

opaque dust clouds bellowing up
engulfing the two of them
finally settling like fading fireworks
slowly diminishing to the ground 

the surface beneath them shatters
panic bombards in
knocking out everything in its path
collapsing her to her knees, shocks rippling her entire body
attempting to maintain control
her body whips about, unable to find stability 

a night terror swells up in her throat
part of her complies to her chains
while the other is held at a far distance
at the edge of an abyss
ready to dive off
bad dreams leave her
wondering why she woke up screaming